Hey fellow sportsball fan! Excited about the big game coming up? I heard there’s a GOAT playing quarterback for the Panhandle Pirates. Who knew they lived to be 43 years old? And how will he fare against that young man that’s always accidentally throwing balls into his neighbor’s backyard barbeque? That dude’s got quite an arm. Wouldn’t want to get in a close game with him.
It simply doesn’t get better than championship sportsball. The culmination of a season of yelling “pass interference!” at my television and throwing my crumb-covered remote in predetermined agony. All the 16oz curls and couch commentary have prepared me for this moment. I’m in peak shape for the hustle of 40 foot refrigerator dashes and blocking pass rushers from my crockpot full of meatballs. High-intensity exercise like this requires some quenching hydration. What can I get you? I’m grabbing some ultra-refreshing suds to wash down the conveyor belt of nachos that will be entering my mouth. Fix yourself a plate of dips and grab a brewski from the fridge. Don’t forget your koozie! Who’s looking forward to the Weekday’s halftime performance? “Ooooh I’m blinded by the lights…”
Hamm’s — $5.49/6pk 16oz or $16.49/30pk
Theodore Hamm was really on to something back in 1865. While the beer is no longer brewed in Minnesota’s land of sky blue waters, it is still just as delicious. Sourcing the purest Milwaukee water, the choicest barley, the most concentrated corn syrup and the greenest hops, it’s no wonder as to why Hamm’s is still the peak of refreshment.
Schell’s Bock — $8.99/6pk
This lager style from Einbeck, Germany was often mispronounced by the southerly Bavarians as “ein bock” which loosely translated to “goat.” Bock beer has since been strongly associated with the imagery of goats. There is a goat playing in this game. Could there be a more perfect beer style to gulp while watching foosball history in the making? The answer is no. Also, this Schell’s brews an excellent bock.
BlackStack Side Of Ranch Lager — $8.99/4pk
It may not be from a hidden valley but dang, this stuff goes with everything! Pour it on your pizza, pour it on your cocktail weenies, pour it in your mouth. This intentionally uncomplicated lager was brewed with a sprinkle of rice for a light, crisp impression. And it’s perfectly slammable for times when your team just coughed up a fumblerooski.
Castle Danger White Pine Project IPA — $18.99/12pk
A good beer for a good cause. If you’re a true outdoorsy Minnesotan, you understand the importance and beauty of the white pines in our northwoods. Proceeds from WPP go toward planting new white pines along the north shore to revitalize their population for future generations. Pops of bright citrus and piney bitterness balance a gentle malt character. At 5.6% abv, it’s mild enough for a long day of gluttonous consumption in front of the big screen.
